Sunday, March 18, 2007
Learning to Fly
At the moment I am facing a health scare and I am not very comfortable. I am not comfortable with hospitals, needles, navigating through uncharted waters or being out of control! I am not comfortable dealing with doctors in an unfamiliar land with language and cultural barriers. I could allow myself to be consumed by the pounding waves of fear and doubt or to drown in a sea of self pity, OR … I can choose trust.
What exactly is trust? Well, its certainly not Pollyanna syndrome – its not denial hidden behind a mask of spirituality. Trust is choosing to focus and letting go. It is holding up your hands and surrendering yourself and fears or worries, knowing that HIS hands are sure. I am so glad that I have a God who loves me and who has ALWAYS proven himself trustworthy.
The fact that God is trustworthy does not mean that as a Christian, I get a free pass to easy street and a cushy life. Nope. It does mean that I have the assurance he is on the throne, he is in control and that he has his hand upon me.
One of the things that I have learnt in life is that we have life lessons. Some of these are one-offs and others are cyclical. (Picture a spring.) This means that we learn a lesson and lay a foundation and then we learn the lesson again – adding more to the foundation each time. When I was younger I used to beat myself up and think that this meant I had not learnt the lessons. Now, I realise that I am on an ascending spiral. I learn the lesson and as I continue to grow and move upwards, I encounter it again and again. Each time, God is asking me to trust more … take bigger steps and enlarge. Isaiah 54 tells us to enlarge the place of our tent and stretch out. This should not come as a surprise, as God is a God of enlargement. Stretching is uncomfortable. It even hurts!
God knew this season in my life was coming. He is not surprised. It has not caught him off guard or unaware. Therefore, he has a plan and a purpose and I have choices to make.
Today, I choose to turn my face to him and practice TRUST. And maybe, just maybe … in this act of trust, I will find freedom and fly.