It's not about the weight and hasn't been about the weight for a long time (do I still need to lose some ... yes I do ... ). Weight is the thing that people focus on because it is the physical manifestation of this journey I have been on.
I sat with a friend the other week trying to explain what it is that keeps me going. I said that I love the challenges ... Can I do a handstand? Yes (I still have to take a breath and slap my mind around it but am becoming less fearful)! Can I do a handstand pushup? Not yet but I am determined that I will! Can I do an unassisted pullup? Not yet, but I have graduated from a black band to a green one! Can I get out of the hole when squatting with weight? Not very well yet ... but I am working on it. Most of all, I love overcoming fear and doing something that I was afraid of. The joy of the journey is in the little successes along the way, and like life, we never arrive.
As the "unsporty" kid, I never dreamed as an adult I would find exercise enjoyable. And never in a million years did I realise the connections between the mental and the physical. When work is stressful, it really helps to go and push some weight around. When I am tired and cranky, it often helps to work out. My body feels more in balance and my mind is being stretched and changed. How much longer? Hopefully, for life!